Day 3: How did you discover you were kinky?
My discover was really unexpected and happened when I was a teenager. My knowledge of my discover was years ago. Reading this you will probably think I'm crazy which I can be but not on this point. I was naive and scared to explore. When I finally began my exploration, years later, the light bulb lite up...lol.
When I was a teenager, I loved to wrestle with the boys. I didn't understand what my body was telling me. I wasn't sexually experienced and really didn't have anyone to speak to about the subject. I was shy and afraid to venture out and find the needed answers. So I pushed those feelings down, buried them.
As my second marriage had failed, I became involved with a Dominant blk man. I didn't see his domination because I was independent, strong-willed and stubborn. Plus it wasn't a forceful domination. We would meet and he always insisted on my wearing a blindfold through out the time we were together. If I would need anything, he would get it or assist me. This included taking me to the restroom. I never really understood why he insisted on the blindfold until years later.
I met a partner who I felt comfortable with. We shared what we were interested in and I entered the swinger lifestyle. All around me was information about BDSM. I took an intest but never disclosed to anyone. I had secret desires to be dominated, to give control to someone else. The big mountain to climb was trusting someone enough. The into my life comes a man who states he was a Dominate.
Acually, he didn't state it. He convinced me to hook up with him and in a phone conversation after he left, we got on the topic of toy bags. He disclosed he had one and I knew. I ask and he confirmed. I thought this would be a great time to explore this lifestyle. The doors opened.
I really didn't get a lot of good information on the first try. I became frustrated because this "supposed" Dom would only tell me to research. He wanted me to enter this lifestyle on my own and with knowledge of what I was getting into.
Several months later, I again began researching. I realized I was using the wrong words to search. The flood gate opened and a weath of information flooded me. This time the right information. I found Fetlife and several other sites that helped provide what I needed to accept what I am...a submissive.
Since receiving this information, I have read books, followed blogs, met people, ask questions and observed D/s relationships in real life. I continue to do all those things. I have also met a Dominate that will assist me with the next level. This is a very exciting time.
My discover was really unexpected and happened when I was a teenager. My knowledge of my discover was years ago. Reading this you will probably think I'm crazy which I can be but not on this point. I was naive and scared to explore. When I finally began my exploration, years later, the light bulb lite up...lol.
When I was a teenager, I loved to wrestle with the boys. I didn't understand what my body was telling me. I wasn't sexually experienced and really didn't have anyone to speak to about the subject. I was shy and afraid to venture out and find the needed answers. So I pushed those feelings down, buried them.
As my second marriage had failed, I became involved with a Dominant blk man. I didn't see his domination because I was independent, strong-willed and stubborn. Plus it wasn't a forceful domination. We would meet and he always insisted on my wearing a blindfold through out the time we were together. If I would need anything, he would get it or assist me. This included taking me to the restroom. I never really understood why he insisted on the blindfold until years later.
I met a partner who I felt comfortable with. We shared what we were interested in and I entered the swinger lifestyle. All around me was information about BDSM. I took an intest but never disclosed to anyone. I had secret desires to be dominated, to give control to someone else. The big mountain to climb was trusting someone enough. The into my life comes a man who states he was a Dominate.
Acually, he didn't state it. He convinced me to hook up with him and in a phone conversation after he left, we got on the topic of toy bags. He disclosed he had one and I knew. I ask and he confirmed. I thought this would be a great time to explore this lifestyle. The doors opened.
I really didn't get a lot of good information on the first try. I became frustrated because this "supposed" Dom would only tell me to research. He wanted me to enter this lifestyle on my own and with knowledge of what I was getting into.
Several months later, I again began researching. I realized I was using the wrong words to search. The flood gate opened and a weath of information flooded me. This time the right information. I found Fetlife and several other sites that helped provide what I needed to accept what I am...a submissive.
Since receiving this information, I have read books, followed blogs, met people, ask questions and observed D/s relationships in real life. I continue to do all those things. I have also met a Dominate that will assist me with the next level. This is a very exciting time.
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