Bad Day

Today was a bad day in general. I think part of the reason was the lack of sleep. I worked last night but got up earlier afternoon around 1:30. Work was steady. I went an x-rays done of my shoulder. I did receive a phone call from the nurse stating nothing was wrong. So I continue to have pain in the shoulder and arm. Then on to my daughter's to play with Gabe before going to his doctor appointment. Everything seemed fine until right before I got to my daughter's home.

I check IM and saw Sir was online. I had been so worried that something was wrong. Last weekend, he told me he had been hospitalized from a cut that got infected. However, that wasn't the reason for the 5 days of no contact. Sir stated he went to the Nascar races. Sir stated it was spur of the minute and he was sorry. Well, my emotions took over. I told him I was pissed and why. I had no response at that moment.

Well, I was playing with Gabe when another popped up on IM. It was a dude that stated he was going to be in town and wanted to hook up. I ask what happened to him contacting me. He stated since I worked weekends, he didn't think I would be available. I informed him that I was off and would have been available on Saturday. Anyways the conversation went to the women of the area. I stated some fuck everything and anything. He placed me in the category since I was willing to meet him and fuck. Well, that was it, I was done. I was already upset and being placed in the same category as the women that had made my life hell because I chose to have my needs satisfied was all I could take. This was all based on that I liked to fuck even though I'm very choosy.

Now, don't get me wrong. I have great respect for some women who like to fuck and do it so freely but I wasn't talking about them. I was talking about the unethical, conniving, drama bitchs that exist in most of my state but that is a story in its self.

I finally told him we could be friends but I wouldn't fuck him since he placed me in that category. Of course he back stepped and stated he didn't put me in the same class. Ok, I'm not liking people at this point.

I had one other thing that I felt I needed to address and that was who I sent my pics too from Friday night. I text subbie girl and ask. What prompted me to do this was I found the profile of an individual that I sent them too. Things fell into place.

Subbie girl had stated her internet was down and would provide with email address to send pics too. I thought that they were her's and her dude's but that was wrong. After sending, I got a response from one. If they would have been friends in the area probably would have made a difference but they weren't. So now I have pics circulating that may reach those I had so carefully attempted to hide myself away from. Of course, subbie girl's solution is to tell them to delete my pics...yeah...right!

And the final was Gabe's re-admission to the hospital. During this time, his ileostomy bag explored and I was soaked with 60 ml of his waste. It wasn't Gabe's fault and he wasn't feeling good. He hadn't been hospitalized since Febuary so we knew it would be soon. I just wanted him to wait until next week so he could participate in the Easter egg hunt.

Well I haven't spoke much about my family but that was apart of my day. I will give you some background. Gabryle was born in November of 2008. He was approximately 8 weeks premature. His lungs and heart were ok but something was wrong with his bladder. He was transferred to Children's Hospital's NICU where he stayed for 6 monthes. He actually didn't get released until he was 9 1/2 months old. He is currently 2nd on the transplant list for his colon, liver, stomach, small intestine and pancrease. He is hospitalized every couple of months due to infections and this happens to be one of those times. This happens to be my major stressor and hardly anyone knows.

I wasn't able to get home before 6 pm and didn't get into bed until 7 pm. The only lucky thing was I called work and told them I was going to be late so that gave me another hour to sleep. I'm hoping to avoid any entanglements because I need a day to de-stress.

I was able to chat with Sir during the afternoon and resolve things. He stated it wouldn't happen again. I don't think I was really asking for much, just a short note or phone message stating he was going to be away and wouldn't be contacting me instead of letting me worry.

Sorry for the rant but I so needed it.