Quotes

I follow several blogs here on blogger. A Dautless Journey posted 2 quotes that I find very profound. The first is “The difference between a truly dominant man and a controlling one is that the dominant man needs and wants consent, whereas the controlling man doesn’t even understand what this word means.” by Sir J

I think this is a quote that all newbies and novice should see. I have often read threads on Fetlife asking about how to search for a Dominant. As most know the controlling isn't really a good Dominant. They just want control and their own demands and needs meet. They care very little about submission or the person giving. They are just concerned with control.

This quote describes Sir. When I expected him just to do something like post or share pics that I have sent, he didn't. As for posting, he ask if he could post to his page even though he requested and I freely provided with the expectation that he would post. I was impressed that he ask for consent before even considering.

During another conversation, I had shared some pics. We then discussed the possible involvement of one of his friends. I ask if he would going to share my pics and he stated only if I wanted him too. Again this took me by surprise. I had conversations with another who shared and didn't even think to mention that he intended to do so.

These were just a couple of instances that helped me to decide that Sir was in fact a good Dominant and the one that I wanted to learn from. He didn't demand or force. He chatted with me to learn more. He assisted in dissolving my anger and trust issues. He listens when I have concerns and doesn't make harsh judgements. Our relationship is LDR but I know I will be comfortable with him and trust that he will see to my safety.

The second quote posted is "Submission can actually engender power: realizing that you have something to give, and that you are capable of mastering your own will to give it up the way your top wants it instead of the way you think S/He should want it, can inspire pride: not the false pride of an inflated ego, but the true pride that, like humility, comes from knowing the depths of your self." — William Henkin. This to me speaks volumes for the essence and heart of a true D/s relationship.